Crazy world

What actions do you consider the craziest in the world? How often do you see or hear about crazy actions? Here it's a lot easier to catch glimpse of minutes of madness spread everywhere. Hardly does a day go by without you stopping on your tracks to laugh your heart out. Sometimes the memory lingers on so much that you occasionally burst into laughter at a neutral place long after the event occured.
This is not the first time I'm seeing evidently frustrated bus conductors venting their anger in a most absurd manner that you don't have any other option but to laugh & knock your head with your neighbour's.
Popularly known for their arrogance, tenacity and sheer disrespect, bus conductors are Lords of the Manor in the transportation realm. Small time if they see crowd wating for bus, they automatically change their billing system. Dragging money with agbero nko? That one na story for another day.
Once on my way home from Ikeja, I saw this Danfo bus caught by LASTMA (the over-efficient state traffic control unit). There was a hot argument between the driver+conductor vs LASTMA officials+police ('cos they always have police men with them to help put fear in motorists). The driver had been caught earlier in the day and had been dragged to LASTMA office to pay N5K for traffic offence. He was then allegedly caught at that point to have have breached traffic rule again. In his determination to show them that he wasn't gonna be dragged away again, the guy started removing his clothes. He DIDN'T STOP removing his clothes. When he got to his panties, HE DID THE SAME. He was stark naked (LOL) by the highway. HE didn't even stop arguing. Visibly embarassed, the LASTMA officials had to return his key and let him go.
Yesterday's case is even funnier. This guy had been stopped just before Tai Solarin's statue at Yaba, Psychiatric Hospital at the other side. The heated argument had definitely been a prolonged one. This time around, there were more police men than LASTMA guys (about 6 to 1), and whenever you see this kind'a combination you should know that's BIG trouble. The policemen (evidently happy to find someone who will provide all the money they need for the weekend groove) adamantly refused to listen to the poor conductor. Na so the guy begin commot cloth like person wey just turn mad now now. This one too didn't stop until he was STARK NAKED! He ranted and squealed and wriggled his body like Femi Kuti playing on stage. Ol'boy this scene wasn't easy oh. The policemen didn't even do as if they were aware that he's naked. Then he started bouncing and 'floating like a butterly, stinging like a bee', Mohammed Ali caricature. Na so Brocos just dey jump up and down like when Lagbaja dey ring bell Gbagaun! Gbagaun!! Gbagaun!!!

P.S The camera wasn't working at that point, I for show you the picture

Love wantintin

They say love is blind........

ABIDJAN, Ivory Coast (Reuters) -- Two prisoners in an Ivory Coast jail who courted and fell in love through a peephole in an iron door have been released for a few hours to get married, one of their jailers said Friday.
Roland Guy Bouabre, serving a 3-year sentence for stealing a bicycle, courted Emilie Yobouet, who was given a one-year sentence for kidnapping a child, while he was delivering groceries for her to cook.
He would take the groceries to the iron door and then a guard would deliver them.
"You can find love in all kinds of places -- even prison," Daloa prison guard Norbert Bah told Reuters by telephone.
Yobouet completed her sentence two days after the wedding but brings food to the jail each day to supplement her husband's meager prison diet.

enTAGlement

Na Diamond dash me work oh. All the same, it's all good.

FOUR JOBS YOU'VE HAD IN YOUR LIFE

1. Systems Engineer

2. Electrical Draughtsman

3. I.T. Representative

4. One kind work for NEPA/PHCN

FOUR FICTIONAL JOBS YOU WISH YOU HAD

1. Programmer in Microsoft Corporation

2. Robotics Engineer in a reputable robotics firm

3. Design Engineer in Sony Corporation

4. A code cracker/hacker/developer at Langley

FOUR MOVIES YOU COULD WATCH OVER AND OVER AGAIN

1. Shawshank redemption

2. Catch me if you can

3. The Last Samurai

4. Conspiracy theory

5. The man in the Iron mask

6. The Bone Collector

7. John Q

8. Oh, I thought you said 40.

FOUR CITIES YOU'VE LIVED IN

1. Lagos

2. Ibadan (hols)

3. City of Ikenne

4. City of Offa

FOUR TV SHOWS YOU LOVE TO WATCH

1. The X-files

2. The New Masquerade

3. Fawlty towers

4. Some mothers do have them

FOUR PLACES YOU'VE BEEN ON VACATION/TRAVELED TO

1. Ibadan

2. Ogbomoso

3. Ilorin

4. Stockholm (In my dreams)

FOUR WEBSITES YOU VISIT DAILY

1. ***.blogspot.com (blogs et al)

2. BBC

3. Guardian Newspaper

4. Slashdot

FOUR OF YOUR FAVORITE FOODS

1. Yam & Fried Eggs. In fact, anything with Fried Eggs

2. King-sized freshly-baked doughnut with sweet jelly inside (on the double)

3. Eba with freshly cooked Okro soup+meat+fish

4. And of course Ijebu Garri (to kan dada)+milk+Milo+groundnut+lil sugar

FOUR THINGS YOU WON'T EAT

1. Cherries - Agbalumo (not even when I'm dead)

2. Plantain chips

3. Boiled meat

4. Guinea fowl egg (looks very scary to me, considering the small size)

FOUR THINGS YOU WISH YOU COULD EAT OR DRINK RIGHT NOW

1. Original yellow Ogi - Pap ( Mayflower style) with Beans that contains shrimps & squashed croaker fish

2. Hot Amala + Okro soup and FRIED meat/fish

3. Serious Chicken burger ( not one prepared in Mr. Biggs oh!)

4. Garri Ijebu+milk+groundnut+Milo with fried peppered fish.

FOUR THINGS IN YOUR BEDROOM

1. Bed

2. PC

3. Cloth hanger

4. Book cupboard

FOUR THINGS YOU WISH YOU HAD IN YOUR BEDROOM

1. More space

2. High end research lab (yes, right in my bedroom)

3. A God-damn pillow that doesn't make my neck hurt in the morning

4. The Woman

FOUR THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW

1. Singlet

2. Black trousers

3. I can't tell you the rest, that's a security issue

4.

FOUR PLACES I'D RATHER BE RIGHT NOW

1. On my bed at home

2. On vacation on that beach they used in The Beach (Leo DiCaprio)

3. Lagoon front, Unilag alone with ____

4. Geneva

FOUR FICTIONAL PLACES I'D RATHER BE RIGHT NOW

1. Eldorado

2. Lagos with some peace and quiet and without power outages

3. Wishing chair

4. Magic carpet

FOUR PEOPLE YOU'D REALLY LOVE TO HAVE DINNER WITH

1. Bill Gates - I wanna know how he beat the whole world to it.

2. Bill Clinton - He should give me lessons on how to talk people to submission & friendliness

3. Jesus - I'll ask him how he was able to pull through in this world. Weren't babes as many and foine as the ones we have now present during his time. Man pikin need special anointing oh. Won ti po ju.

4. Sit tight African leaders+old ones who wanna come back - I sure will ask why they want to further impoverish the people and want to die on the throne.

THINGS YOU ARE THINKING RIGHT NOW

1. I hope I'm not giving too much information for me to be whacked

2. Why didn't I know it's this stressful to simply do this

3. Somebody has to pay me for this amount of time & energy I'm expending

4. When will my time come? I'm doing so much in order to be successful

FOUR OF YOUR FAVORITE THINGS

1. Shoes

2. My Phone

3. Simply designed T-shirt+ Jeans

4. Music

FOUR PEOPLE YOU TAG

Dem go don tag everybody now! Well sha, make I try.

1. Keshi

2. Trae

3. Christabelle

4. Laide

Take am!

You never start your hand don dey shake. Simply hilarious.

A year and counting

Today, I discovered that I've spent just a couple of days more than a year on blogspot. I must admit that I've met many wonderful people on the web and I've been able to broaden my horizon and learn other people's ideologies & ways of thinking.
I cannot but thank everyone who spend time going through my rants. I really appreciate you all. Those that make it a duty to leave comments, I'm deeply grateful. I cannot thank you all enough for your support, correction & encouragement.
My desire for the blogosphere is have blogs that'll impact people's lives for the positive. Those that will encourage the way people live their lives and encourage togetherness, versatility, success, and above all humour.

The next year promises to be one more humourous and tantalizing. Try sit tight like African leaders & enjoy the ride.

Sayonara

It's necessary to note the good works of people who have refused to remain passive in leadership and in one way or another decided to be instruments for change and better ways of doing things.
On this note I wanna say ou revoir to Baba Fryo himself & Junichiro Presley.











Your great works speak volume & will always live after you.
It's very hard to imagine Baba Iyabo as the Secretary-General of the UN, since he was tussling with Kofi Annan then. How would things be worlwide now? Would everything have become privatised? Abi the war in Iraq wouldn't have started if he was there?

I can only imagine.......

Tables turn

The young man standing laughing
But he knows where the shoe dey pain am so
He no fit do anything today
But one day the tables will turn

The little children on the streets
Are working hard so they can eat
Them no fit do anything but cry
One day the tables will turn

My sister with the sexy eyes
Selling her body so she can eat
She no fit do anything but worry
But one day the tables will turn

....................

The average man doesn't ask for too much
he only wants what you & I want
A safe place to lay his head at night
Is that too much to ask?
.....................

Beautiful Nubia's Tables turn in his new album Fere speaks directly to my spirit. His music raises the hairs on the back of my neck, I still cannot fathom why. I keep feeling like a Gani or something each time I hear him sing.
Frankly, he should be applauded for the soulful music he churns out.

Listen to it.

Only in my homeland

Listening to the radio this evening, I heard an embattled state governor accused of embezzling funds meant for state development quoting from the bible. Ekiti state governor, Ayo Fayose is accused of diverting huge public funds to build houses for himself, his mother and for other personal issues. His aides were once accosted in his presence on their way out of the nation and huge sums of money were found in their bags. His words were as those of one seasoned in the study of the holy book.
He said: "I want them to know that the God I serve would definitely put them to shame because their gathering is not of God and it would be scattered."
Quoting from the bible (only God knows if he knows where it is), he said "Those that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. The shall mount up with wings as eagles".
He said he had taken very good care of the legislators more than any other governor in the country, wondering why they decided to collude with the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC) to get him out of office at all costs.
I remember Alams also saying that God had aided his escape from the UK.
And if these people actually study the holy book as it seems, how come they don't follow the instructions? How come they can easily memorise the verses but fail to live by what they read?
This God must be a very patient God.
It's only in my homeland that you hear of such things happening.